First thing I learned on this trip: being met at the airport by a security detail is SO much cooler than being met by a limo.

We lost most of Monday traveling over here but, hey, it’s a freakin’ Monday. The sun was already down when we landed in Kuwait City so I haven’t seen much of anything but the inside of the airport. The Kuwaiti official who processed my papers said I had to tell him a joke or I wouldn’t get a visa. Smartass is a universal language.

Thankfully, the magazine in my room at the Radisson has an article titled “How To Tell Your Shemagh From Your Agal”. I’d been staying awake at night for weeks prior to this trip worried about that. To return the favor, I am explaining to anyone who passes by the difference between a “dingus” and Harry Reid.

Today and tomorrow are the most relaxed days for us on this trip (only one show tomorrow). We get busy after that but I will try to post here and everywhere else (Twitter, FaceBook) when I can. Of course, I will pass shouts back and forth between people at home and the troops as they are passed to me.

We’re lucky enough to have Col. Ed Shock, the head of Armed Forces Entertainment, along with us for this trip. I put in a special request to be able to shoot any weapon they can find for me this week, which would more than make up for the whole “no beer” thing.

Three of the comics on this trip are women. All are being very risque and showing a lot of face, which we hope won’t get us in trouble here.

I’m sharing a room the next two nights with Mark Riccadonna, who is very funny and has gas. Who needs a wake-up call?

It’s late and I want to be perky for my free breakfast buffet tomorrow.